Aren’t wives and wives-to-be supposed to know the answer to this? So here, let me share with you the answers I gathered from my friends…

-having a beautiful daughter

-surprise dates

-the key to our happiness is “sharing” and discovering new things together (sharing even if it is painful)

-accepting who I am as a person

-I am happy when I see her happy

-in a crowd of people you have to stand out, not just physically, just like the first time he laid eyes on you (how? by being true to herself, know your value)

-wife’s home cooked meals :)

-discovering and learning are part of the fun :)

-respect from his wife

-good sex

-good natured and submissive wife

Prior to finding the right mate, I believe we should “be” the right mate first. I totally agree with “knowing your value” and realizing your worth. Making him (your husband) happy is a result of you being happy with yourself first. =)

I can't find the site where I got these questions. Anyway, I hope these questions would help you and your soon-to-be to know more about each other... =)

Family Planning
  • Will we have children?
  • If so, when?
  • How many children will we have?
  • Who will be the disciplinarian?
  • Will we send them to private or public school?
  • Will one of us stay at home to raise the children?
  • If we are having a hard time conceiving, will you be opposed to artificial methods of conception?
  • Would you be willing to adopt?
  • What birth control methods will we use if we decide to wait?
  • What values do we want to instill in our children, and how will we do so?
  • How will we discipline our children?
  • What would be the consequences for ...?
  • How will we reward our children?
  • Will we give them allowance?
  • Will we set limits on privileges?
  • Where do we stand on junk food, video games...?
  • How much family time is appropriate?
  • What do you consider quality time as a family? With each other?
  • What is our long-term daycare plan? What's our back-up? Can we afford it?
  • How much time will we spend with the in-laws?
  • What will we do for holidays?
  • If something happens to the both of us, who will take care of our children?


  • Who's going to handle the finances?
  • Will we have separate or joint accounts?
  • Will we split the bills or pay them together?
  • Who will be responsible for the budgeting?
  • What is your spending style? Are you a spender or a saver?
  • How are you financially preparing for retirement?
  • What are your views on debt (credit cards, loans, etc.)?
  • How much can we spend each month?
  • How much do we plan on saving each month?
  • What are our long-term goals? Saving for a house? College? Retirement?
  • How much do you spend shopping each month?
  • Do we create a house budget and write down everything we spend?
  • Do we have a certain amount of money that's individual or are we pooling everything?
  • If one of us lost our job, what would we do?
  • Does one of us want a career change in the future? How would we finance that?
  • If it came time to buy a new car, what kind would you get? How much would you spend? What are your plans now for saving towards that?
  • Do we have emergency money? How can we save that? What constitutes an "emergency"?
  • Is there a spending limit that we should check with each other before making purchases over a certain amount?
  • What are our priorities? Is college money more important or is a new kitchen, etc.?
  • Will each of us draft a will? What should the will say?
 Home Life

  • Where will we live after the wedding?
  • Will we rent or purchase?
  • What chores are expected of each other?
  • Where will we live after we retire?
  • What will the bride's last name be after the wedding?
  • What will we do when both sets of our parents are in their advanced ages?

  • Will both of us work?
  • If I get a career opportunity in another city or state or even country, would you be willing to move?
  • When are we planning on retiring?

Communication Style

  • Are you willing to talk about issues or do you brood?
  • How much communication is too much and leads to overload?
  • Would you be willing to seek help from a third party (counseling) if we are unable to resolve our issues on our own?


  • How do you handle stress and crises that suddenly occur? Do you explode or do you step back and approach the issue calmly or somewhere in between?

  • Does your family have any history of serious medical problems?
  • Do you have a history of serious medical problems?
  • Have you ever been, or are now, addicted to: drinking, smoking, drugs, gambling?
  • Would you be opposed to the both of us getting tested for sexually transmitted diseases?
  • What should we do if the other is on life support? Will we draft a Living Will/Trust?

  • I am so glad I came across the 5 Love Languages! It helped me know myself and my partner more. More importantly, it helped me learn how to show I love Bert the way he would feel loved! =)

    Words of Affirmation Actions don’t always speak louder than words. If this is your love language, unsolicited compliments mean the world to you. Hearing the words, “I love you,” are important—hearing the reasons behind that love sends your spirits skyward. Insults can leave you shattered and are not easily forgotten.

  • Quality Time In the vernacular of Quality Time, nothing says, “I love you,” like full, undivided attention. Being there for this type of person is critical, but really being there—with the TV off, fork and knife down, and all chores and tasks on standby—makes your significant other feel truly special and loved. Distractions, postponed dates, or the failure to listen can be especially hurtful.

  • Receiving Gifts Don’t mistake this love language for materialism; the receiver of gifts thrives on the love, thoughtfulness, and effort behind the gift. If you speak this language, the perfect gift or gesture shows that you are known, you are cared for, and you are prized above whatever was sacrificed to bring the gift to you. A missed birthday, anniversary, or a hasty, thoughtless gift would be disastrous—so would the absence of everyday gestures.

  • Acts of Service Can vacuuming the floors really be an expression of love? Absolutely! Anything you do to ease the burden of responsibilities weighing on an “Acts of Service” person will speak volumes. The words he or she most want to hear: “Let me do that for you.” Laziness, broken commitments, and making more work for them tell speakers of this language their feelings don’t matter.

  • Physical Touch This language isn’t all about the bedroom. A person whose primary language is Physical Touch is, not surprisingly, very touchy. Hugs, pats on the back, holding hands, and thoughtful touches on the arm, shoulder, or face—they can all be ways to show excitement, concern, care, and love. Physical presence and accessibility are crucial, while neglect or abuse can be unforgivable and destructive.